Mars or Bust

10 Sep

Marvin_the_Martian_by_raelynn36I’m not really sure why I just heard about this, but it has recently made it onto my radar that a company in the Netherlands is recruiting volunteers to help colonize Mars.  I gather they made some kind of announcement in January and then started actively advertising that they wanted volunteers in April.  And thousands of people have already applied.

Whoa.

First those little robot vacuums and now this?  I think we can safely say we live in the future, my friends.

There are catches though.  One big one in particular: it’s a one-way ticket.  Like, you aren’t coming back.  Ever.

Based on a comprehensive poll of my household, interest in colonizing Mars looks like this:

  • 50% of the sample polled (me) would not do this if everyone they knew on Earth was dead and they would be guaranteed a billion dollar pay cheque for participating.
  • 50% of the sample polled (my husband) thinks it is a major contribution to societies of the future and would probably do it if I was interested too.
Dear god, man - are you completely insane?

Dear god, man – are you completely insane?

See, my husband and I are compatible, but we are not the same.  He is the type of person that will occasionally jump out of airplanes that are not on fire.  He is also the type of person who thinks that refusing to sleep in a room where one saw a gigantic spider go in but not come out is silly.  This may have something to do with his being from Australia.  Australians seem to have an inexplicably cavalier attitude toward flirting with death and/or enormous arachnids.

However, when there are no spiders in evidence and my feet are safely on the ground, I can be brought around to the idea that yes, sometimes people survive skydiving and being near big spiders.

But Mars.  We’re talking certain death.  And yes, death is always certain, but it’s certain in normal ways – cancer or heart failure or car crash.  But Mars – who the hell knows?  You could die of space flu.  (My husband says this is not a thing.  I say, how do we know that.)  Or you could die of alien attack.  Or of human attack when your new little society goes all Lord of the Flies.  Or of running out of breathable air or drinkable water.  Or of I don’t even know what because who knows what could happen when you are going to spend the ENTIRE REST OF YOUR LIFE on Mars?

Nope.  Never.  Never never never.

Of course, I haven’t mentioned the best part.  They’re going to have it beamed back to Earth for us to watch.  They say it’s for educational purposes.  But we all know the truth, don’t we?  That’s right: Big Brother – The Martian Chronicles.  I don’t know if they’re planning to have it live (or if that’s even possible; my astrophysics is iffy), but if it were?  People could die. Well, eventually, they absolutely would.  It would be kind of like watching the Hunger Games.  I tend to think that reality TV has already gone too far, but this, this is something else.

What do you think, people?  Would you apply to colonize Mars?  Or have you already?  Why or why not?  Is this really the hope for the future as we continue to screw up the environment here?  Would you watch this show?  Do you see ethical issues with a show like this?  Please.  Inquiring minds want to know.

4 Responses to “Mars or Bust”

  1. Colleen Brynn September 12, 2013 at 9:19 am #

    This is too, too weird for me! NEVER come back? I’m with you…
    That is an adventure I’m definitely not prepared (mentally or physically) for.
    I may tune in at least once out of (morbid?) curiosity. But I am not really into reality tv, so only time would tell if I would stick to it. Would you watch?

    • Stephanie September 12, 2013 at 10:09 pm #

      I don’t think I could watch. I find true stories so much more intense and upsetting than fiction. I mean, what if you actually saw someone suffocate out there? How horrible would that be? Ick, no.

  2. Katie September 12, 2013 at 3:00 pm #

    Um, no. Going into space would be way – WAY cool – but I would definitely want the hope of coming back. Our planet is way too beautiful to leave it forever to live on a dead rock with no breathable atmosphere – no mater how cool the sky view.

    • Stephanie September 12, 2013 at 10:12 pm #

      Oh, see, you’d at least be interested in going then. I barely handle flying, and even then I really need to focus on my destination. The idea of going to space scares me in a way I can only describe as claustrophobic, even though I guess it’s kind of the opposite. Even that trailer that’s out right now for that Sandra Bullock and George Clooney space movie – I can’t watch it. Just gives me the willies thinking about it.

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